TSA at PHL

My bag was off to the belly of the jet and I was on my way to security.  It took a bit of looking around and reading signs before I figured where I was going.  I soon found a conveyer of rollers that curved and led to a powered rubber belt, which went through a blue tunnel.  I guessed that was a scanner.  People were putting the pocket contents, belts and shoes into dish pan type bins on the rollers.  I followed suit.  I then placed my carry-on bags in another bin and threw my jacket on top of them.  Once unburdened, I walked towards an arch that I also assumed was a scanner.

On the other side of the arch was a female wearing a military type uniform.  I think I saw a TSA patch on her shoulder.  As I approached the arch the female officer barked that I should push my belongings up to the belt.  I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck come to attention.  I refrained from barking back.  I wasn't quite sure what she said, when she barked again to push my belongings up hill to the moving belt.   I refrained from growling.  I did as I was told but the blood was warming my face.  I had to keep my paws from becoming fists.


Barefooted and beltless I walked through the arch.  An alarm sounded.  My ears stood straight up.  I knew I had nothing to be alarmed about.  The TSA officer told me, "Don't touch my scanner!"  Now, I was ready to fight.

TSA

It usually takes me a long time to get to that point.  There have been many times in my life I took a beating because I take so long to build up a head of steam.  Less than a minute into this confrontation and I was ready.

I said, "Is there a sign that says 'Don't touch the scanner', because if there is, I missed it."   She gave me a look of authoritative disgust that quickly turned to a smirk as I backed through the arch.  She had a feeling of power over me.  I was on a choker collar and she knew it.  I had a feeling I might be missing my flight.

KDKA CBS2

I walked through the arch again, this time without touching the sides.  No alarm sounded.  I was asked to spread my arms and was padded down.  I was allowed to retrieve my belongings and put on my shoes and belt.  I threw on my jacket, gathered up my carry-on and was off to find a cool place and a cold beer.


As I walked through the departure terminal, I wondered what went through the minds of the TSA officers when they saw all the equipment in my carry-on; CPAP, face mask, strobe, gel cel battery, wall voltage adapters, camera and light modifier.  It could have been bomb making materials.  I didn't wonder for long.  I found a snug spot and curled up onto a stool at Chickie's and Pete's to lick my wounded ego.

©Damyon T. Verbo - all rights reserved

Packing Luggage for London

The middle bag above was the size of my stowaway bag

I put my wife and son on a plane to London Wednesday night before my flight on Sunday Oct. 23.  I began to gather the items I needed to pack my bags for London as soon as I returned home from the airport.

One of my carry-ons was like this bag which contained my CPAP

One of my carry-ons was this shape and had a retractable handle and wheels 

        As I wrote earlier, my wife tripped and hurt her foot the day after they landed.  My son emailed with additional items to add to my bags.  The items included several pairs of footwear and dried mangos, blueberries and two pounds of cashews from Costco.  My daughter, in London, also requested I bring a quantity pack of cucumber mellon scented Dove deodorant from Costco, a pumpkin carving kit

Walmart

Walmart

and an aerosol can of Pure Citrus Orange Air Freshener from Walmart and two bags of fresh cranberries from a supermarket.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          

The aerosol can, deodorant and pumpkin carving kit went into my stowed luggage not to be misconstrued as bomb making materials or weapons with which to take over the aircraft.  The rest would fit into my carry-on.

There were some items that were mandatory in my carry-on luggage.  
They were:


 • my medications (heart, hypertension, reflux, low dose aspirin)

• my CPAP machine  
  (continuous positive airway pressure for sleep apnea), face mask 
  and tubing (my breathing sounds like Darth Vader)

• my camera for photographing the wedding couple before and   
  during the reception
• strobe

• sealed gel cell battery for strobe
• strobe attachment bar
• strobe light modifier

• strobe wall voltage adapter
• mobile phone wall voltage adapter


If you know anyone with obstructive sleep apnea, you know the importance of a CPAP machine in getting that person a good night's sleep.  When I underwent sleep testing, I was told I awakened three hundred times throughout the night and entered REM within the first ten minutes of sleep.  That is not good for the heart (which is why I had most of the meds) nor for a restful sleep.  No wonder I used to fall asleep at the drop of a hat.  All I needed to do was sit still in one place and in no time, I was asleep.  I was constantly embarrassing my wife and family.  "Dad's asleep, again", would be heard at every gathering we attended.  Or my fellow workers would snicker or outright laugh at me during meetings.  My falling asleep was terribly troubling when I drove a car.  As you might well imagine.  This machine is a necessity and that is why it was in my carry-on.


I now needed to make room in my carry-on for three pairs of footwear, a bag each of dried blueberries and mangos, two pounds of cashews and two bags of cranberries.


I began to wonder what kind of questioning I would go through with security at the airport.  There was the CPAP, face mask and hoses plus the battery and strobe and all the electronic items and now food and three pairs of footwear in my carry-on.  What red flags would that throw up?  I was soon to find out.


©Damyon T. Verbo - all rights reserved