Saturday, December 3, 2011


My bag was off to the belly of the jet and I was on my way to security.  It took a bit of looking around and reading signs before I figured where I was going.  I soon found a conveyer of rollers that curved and led to a powered rubber belt, which went through a blue tunnel.  I guessed that was a scanner.  People were putting the pocket contents, belts and shoes into dish pan type bins on the rollers.  I followed suit.  I then placed my carry-on bags in another bin and threw my jacket on top of them.  Once unburdened, I walked towards an arch that I also assumed was a scanner.

On the other side of the arch was a female wearing a military type uniform.  I think I saw a TSA patch on her shoulder.  As I approached the arch the female officer barked that I should push my belongings up to the belt.  I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck come to attention.  I refrained from barking back.  I wasn't quite sure what she said, when she barked again to push my belongings up hill to the moving belt.   I refrained from growling.  I did as I was told but the blood was warming my face.  I had to keep my paws from becoming fists.

Barefooted and beltless I walked through the arch.  An alarm sounded.  My ears stood straight up.  I knew I had nothing to be alarmed about.  The TSA officer told me, "Don't touch my scanner!"  Now, I was ready to fight.
It usually takes me a long time to get to that point.  There have been many times in my life I took a beating because I take so long to build up a head of steam.  Less than a minute into this confrontation and I was ready.

I said, "Is there a sign that says 'Don't touch the scanner', because if there is, I missed it."   She gave me a look of authoritative disgust that quickly turned to a smirk as I backed through the arch.  She had a feeling of power over me.  I was on a choker collar and she knew it.  I had a feeling I might be missing my flight.
I walked through the arch again, this time without touching the sides.  No alarm sounded.  I was asked to spread my arms and was padded down.  I was allowed to retrieve my belongings and put on my shoes and belt.  I threw on my jacket, gathered up my carry-on and was off to find a cool place and a cold beer.

As I walked through the departure terminal, I wondered what went through the minds of the TSA officers when they saw all the equipment in my carry-on; CPAP, face mask, strobe, gel cel battery, wall voltage adapters, camera and light modifier.  It could have been bomb making materials.  I didn't wonder for long.  I found a snug spot and curled up onto a stool at Chickie's and Pete's to lick my wounded ego.

©Damyon T. Verbo - all rights reserved

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